There’s a common plot twist that has been used many times in comic books. It’s when a main character dies but returns only a few issues later seeming to have risen from the dead. You spend all this time re-imagining your life without this person. You try to remember a time when they weren’t there. It’s hard, sometimes near impossible. But you get through it. Life goes on. Just when you move on, your life gets back to normal…BAM! POW! KABOOM!…you’re right back where you started. Trying to re-imagine that life one more time. It was no surprise that my life would follow a similar storyline. Now it wasn’t something as tragic as a death but someone I thought was out of my life was returning. There was definitely a BAM! but the POW! and KABOOM! wouldn’t come until later in my story. But before we get to that mystery man there was another man in my life who couldn’t stay away.
Turns out a person can’t have sex just for fun or at least not this person. All those feelings that get tangled up and only confuse the situation don’t just disappear. It’s all a lie. Of course if you’re being intimate with someone you’re going to want more. Any one who tells you otherwise is most likely lying. I know this because that’s where I was. I was constantly trying to convince myself that I wasn’t falling for Jason. We were just having a good time, I could detach at any time. Another little fact about me, I’m a terrible lair. It turns out lying to myself wasn’t any easier. I was falling for Jason. It was wrong, I knew it was wrong. He was that guy you fantasize about. I’m not talking the knight in shining armor, riding a white horse fantasy. It’s more the ripping off each other clothes before even getting to the door, everything is pulsing type of fantasy. Any girl who thought that a guy like Jason was the long term boyfriend type was fooling themselves. I guess I should raise my hand because I was becoming that girl. Only how can you talk to a guy about where your relationship is going when he never stays long enough to have a conversation.
My love life as usual was unbalanced but that didn’t mean I wasn’t centered in other areas. Surprisingly my longest relationship was turning out to be with yoga. We’d finally gotten to that comfortable space in our relationship where we just got each other. I knew I wasn’t always going to want to spend time with yoga but I made sure I made a special time for the two of us. Yoga knew a had limits to what I could do. Even though it pushed my to those limits it never went to far. We were the perfect couple. Who would have guessed that all the years I’ve been on this planet my most meaningful relationship would be with a thin mat no bigger then myself.
Back to that person who decided to rise from the dead, no it’s no who you’re thinking. If that were to happen I’d be curled up in that yoga mat huddle in a corner. My mystery man was also known as the man of steel. Henry wasn’t done with me yet and even though I may have told myself differently I wasn’t done with him. What had happened though? Wasn’t he the example of the perfect man. A perfect man doesn’t go on a date with someone and not call Even if he’s no longer interested wouldn’t you think the polite thing to do would call to let that girl know things wouldn’t work out. Logically if he was interested he certainly would have reached out for date number two. I ask again what happened? This is where the whole being an actor becomes really convenient. Having a career where you need to drop everything for that once in a lifetime part is a great excuse for not calling the girl you told that you had a lovely time. At least that was Henry’s excuse. His agent had called during our first date but being a perfect gentleman Henry let the call go to voicemail. After our first kiss, though it’s not really fair to call a kiss on the cheek a first kiss, he finally listened to that message. The role of a lifetime was available and Henry’s name was being tossed around with it. Which meant that on the same night of our first date he had to get on a plane to LA. It also meant all of his focus had to be on getting that role. Thoughts of second and third dates had to be pushed aside for the moment. He figured I would understand. It’s what goes with dating an actor. Little did he know how well I understood. Which meant I also understood this most likely wouldn’t be the only time I’d come second to his career. Yet knowing what I knew I still agreed to that second date.
If our first date was like a car driving on a freshly paved road, the second was that same car driving down a road lined with speedbumps, covered in sand and broken glass. It was beyond awkward. I had already called this relationship. It had flat lined and I was already removing the sheets from the bed, getting it ready for the next patient. When you’ve already closed the door on someone it’s a lot harder to open it back up again. I had already done the whole envisioning a future with Henry. When he never called me after our first date that future started to fade like that picture of Marty McFly and his siblings in Back To The Future. In my case there was no enchantment under the sea dance to save us from completely disappearing. Henry had to realize he was wrong about me understanding about being forgotten or put on pause. I wasn’t sure before if I would get a date two, but by the way things were going I was certain I would never get a date three. Certainly not after what happened next.
Remember the whole me being great at making mistakes. That also applies to my choice of cocktails. There was a special drink that night called the Joker. I thought it had to be a sign. A drink named after one of the most notorious comic villains ever, me on a date with the guy who plays probably the most famous superhero alive. One plus one equals two, this had to be fate telling me this date wasn’t doomed to be the disaster it was shaping up to be. The comic book gods wanted this to work. Even people who don’t believe in fate had to admit this was more then a coincidence. Sadly the only sign the universe was trying to tell me was that fireworks and alcohol don’t mix. You would think any sane person would know that anyway. But sometimes dates are just that bad that even the sanest person let’s a few things slip. And sometimes we don’t always read the signs correctly until it’s too late. Or until you and your date are both covered in ash. Date three was definitely off the table.
Another fun fact about me is I like sports. I’m talking crazed fan, paint on my face, trash talking the opponents kind of sports fan. Baseball is one of my favorites. In baseball they have these things they call strikes. Strikes are like chances, once you get three of them though your out. That’s it your turns over, walk back to the dugout and thing about how much of a failure you are. At this point in the date I had about 300 strikes. I should have gone back to the locker room by this point locked myself in a locker never to retun to the outside world. But I wanted to take one more swing for the fences so I invited Henry back to my place to clean up. It was the least I could do since I almost blew up his face. It would have been a crime against humanity if I had destroyed something so beautiful. There was no salvaging this date in my mind. My fantasy of a picture perfect romance with Henry that had crept back in my mind the minute after he called me for a second date had been stomped out. I may not ever call Henry my boyfriend but maybe I could at least have the friend part. I normally just dated super heroes but who’s to say I couldn’t be friends with them instead. Look at Ryan. He’s been two supreheroes, Green Lantern and Deadpool, and he was one of my best friends. I was going to be friends with Henry. Perfect, gorgeous Henry who at that same moment I made up my mind we would just be friends was naked in my shower. This would be a piece of cake, right?
Have you ever planned a big party, maybe it’s for a birthday or even a wedding. Think about that time. About how many hours you spend planning out every detail. Who would be there, would you serve dinner or just have appetizers, did you want a dj or a live band? All of these pieces that needed to be planned just right in order for your party to be a success. Now think of the actual party. After all the plans had been put into place did things go according to plan? That’s the funny thing about plans. They don’t always work out the way you think yet the results are often better then you could ever imagine. My plan that night was to walk away with a new friend in Henry. Clearly we didn’t work as a couple. Some relationships have fireworks, figuratively. Ours had actual fireworks. A relationship between the two of us was dangerous. People could get hurt, literally. If everything had gone according to plan that night the rest of my story would be very different. As I mentioned before plans rarely turn out how we expect them to.
When you’re little you find yourself wishing a lot. You wish on stars, candles, coins. Usually you wish for silly things like a pony or being able to stay up past 9. As we get older we still wish for things. Maybe not on stars and maybe not a pony (though secretly we all still want that pony). Our wishes become more realistic, obtainable. We wish for good health, for peace in the world, for success in our lives. The most popular wish is to wish for love. I had had love in my life. Unfortunately I had lost it and even though what I went through was incredibly painful, I still wanted it again. I had no idea that this time when I wished for love I’d be presented with so many options. Who knows maybe there was still another option out there I had yet to meet.
If you’d like to download any of the characters or builds you see in this story I will post the links to them below, along with a great big thank you to the creators!
Erin created by swcheppes
Jason Momoa created by viltor87 (I’ve given him a bit of a makeover compared to the downloaded version)
Henry Cavill created by andreamigriane
Chris Evans created by yddam98